Harls&ted for the last 2 years has been used as a platform for mummies to share their experiences of entering single mummy life, by sharing my own experience this has lead to other mummies messaging me, whether that be just for a chat, cry or some reassurance that if I’m coping and getting through it then so can they.
Messages come in weekly and I try my best to get back to each and everyone of you.
Today I wanted to share something Harlie said /asked me this morning...
Harlie: mummy is daddy taking me cheerleading tonight?
Me: yes baby why?
Harlie: because I asked (his girlfriend, I won’t put names) if she wanted to come and watch me
Me: oh ok
Harlie: do you think that would be ok mummy
Me: would that make you happy Harlie?
Me: then if you’re happy Harls so is mummy
My ex rang me a few hours later regarding the kids and I told him that if (his girlfriend) wanted to join them tonight at cheerleading then I was happy for this too happen
Not sure if he thought I was joking or drunk to be honest, but the point I’m trying to make is this.....
Mummies stop looking at your ex as the worst person in the world don’t waste your energy, look at it like you are the bigger person that the breakup was a blessing in disguise regardless of how much they betrayed you. You can not change a person who doesn’t see an issue with their own actions, you and your kids happiness and wellbeing is all that matters from now on...show your kids strength as hard as that may be for you right now.
With no apology still from my ex or his girlfriend I could easily still be bitter..but the thought of my kids being able to say to me when they are older..... ‘Thanks mum’
that’s what keeps me on the right track.
Don’t let your bitterness or anger damage your child’s upbringing they didn’t ask for this like you didn’t ...keep them in a loving bubble....they don’t need to recover from a bad relationship after all it wasn’t their fault or doing.
Remember you can’t expect people to think or do things the way you would... I know it hurts I know it’s sh*t at times but at the end of the day it’s totally down to you whether you allow the past to keep damaging your future but more importantly your kiddies future.
Stay strong mummies...love you